The Chamber of Secrets has been opened… But not even young hero wizard Harry Potter could save these starting QB's from serious injury this past week! Donovan got McNabbed with a broken ankle, Tommy Maddox joined another dimension for awhile, Brian Griese's knee went all poofy and Marc Bulger sprained his little pinky (aw poor baby!), and did I mention that they're changing QB's once again in our nation's capital? Guess we'll just have to get used to a whole new crop of starting QB's this week, won't we? And for starters, that's Koy, not Ty, under center for the Eagles… The Raiders get their long awaited revenge, shouting a loud "Tuck You!" to the Patriots. The Giants win a big game, behind Jeremy Shockey's and his 11 receptions and The Rising also win in the same week, although with no help from no-TD's Shockey, I might add. Coincidence, I think not… Neil keeps on winning and Ian keeps on losing, just another week in the Rowdy Friends Fantasy Football League…

Et tu Jolley? Say it ain't so, Chris? Can it really be? Where were you when head coach Chris Jolley was fired? Another week without a win? This one a 42 - 32 loss to Kang Kong? Gee Ian, all this losing, I never knew you were a Democrat? Yes folks, we're at oh and eleven and counting. Seattle, we have a problem! Next up for Late For The Draft, the Wet Toast Offense and a healthy Marshall Faulk! Please mommy, make it stop… The win for Dave, puts Kang Kong amongst the 8 other teams with 5 wins, putting The Kong just half a game out of 5th place, but just another half a game out of 12th…

Creeping ever closer to the elusive .500 career mark and maintaining his slim half game overall lead, Neil Eskow earns a (high points) buck this week with a 58 - 49 win over Down Boy! Down Boy drops their 3rd straight game and fall under .500 (yep, they've got 5 wins too!). Charlie and Joe are now also in jeopardy of relinquishing their career lifetime victories lead. Yeah, yeah, I know one less season than everyone else behind them, yada, yada, yada… Oh and be sure to check out the new Down Boy logo on their team stats page as Charlie does his best Old Mother Hubbard impression and "gives the dog a bone"! This old man came rolling home… Next up for Bubba's Brew it's a BCS special, #1 versus #2, as Austin powers their way in to town. Again the Jinx Factor will be high as The Commish is something like 11 - 1 all time against Neil in head-to-head competition, but if you look real closely at Neil's roster you might see a certain running back named Garner lingering there, just waiting for The Commish…

Speaking of, The Commish and Mark are feeling quite randy after winning their 6th straight game, a 49 - 43 squeaker over the River Ave Rats. Fifteen of the 24 active players on both sides scored in this game, but surprisingly only one running back? Go figure. With the loss, the Rats become the only 4 - 6 team from Week 10 to lose and thus are not a member of the exclusive "5 Win Club". Frustrated with the way the season has gone for the Rats thus far, co-owner Jim Murray has expressed an interest in getting off of River Ave and exploring the possibilities of coaching another team elsewhere. Ian, can we get an application over to Jimmy anytime soon? As for Mike Flinn, all I can say is "warm up the bus, tune up the fat lady and sorry, Yogi, it's over". Here's to the return of Jay Fiedler and next football season! Oh and before I go, have to get in my weekly Notre Dame reference. They're playing Rutgers this week so how much Fighting are the Irish really going to have to do? Hey Bamricks, care for a side wager…

Kevin Kelly now has bragging rights at the next gathering of Svenska employees old and new as a result of his 45 - 32 bursting of The Moops bubble, the third straight loss for the Caruso Brothers who now find themselves in the "Five Win Pack" with the others. Still unable to settle on a third running back, Guy and Joe find themselves considering adding Joe Morris, Rob Carpenter, Butch Woolfolk or Ottis Anderson to the roster! And while we're talking about roster changes, how many guys has Cut The Cord employed already this season? Anyone care to total up the points they've lost from guys they've dropped? I bet you they outscore The Rising…

But there was one team who couldn't outscore The Rising this week, as The Boss and The Big Man notch a 31 - 29 win over KGB III. Of course I don't think Ken's going to be in any shape to fret over it as I hear he's going to an Other Ones concert on Wednesday night. No, he's not going to see all his old kickers! The Other Ones are the remaining members of the Grateful Dead, who've gotten back together to tour once again (sponsored of course, by E-Z-Wider and Geritol). Which brings back fond memories of the 1995 season (no not the E-Z-Wider, that was back in '86) when Dead front man Jerry Garcia passed away and Ken named his team In Memory Of Jerry while Charlie and Joe, keeping their tradition of naming their franchise after dead musicians, dubbed their team Bury Garcia! Needless to say a feud ensued that still has overtones today! Hey at least they didn't name their team Grateful He's Dead, although I do recall that was a consideration…

Douche's Wild dropped a 48 - 27 decision to The Moon Runners, who move to 8 - 3 with their 3rd straight win and stay within a half game and some points of the top spot. With the loss, Rob drops to 5 - 5 - 1 and thus also gains membership into the "5 Win Club". Sorry Rob, while membership does have its privileges, this one does not come with 5 free lap dances or 5 minutes of peeping for just a quarter. And from the "how rumors get started" department comes this quote from Rob as he replaces injured kicker Todd "Norm" Peterson. "We'll go with the ex-Adult Book Store Mop Boy, Jeff Reed". You know, I thought that guy looked familiar… Has anyone heard a peep from Mr. Boghosian in the past few weeks? No transactions this season so far (well he is 8 - 3 after all), nary an e-mail since Week 2 (not even any good spam), and no television appearances on ESPN's coverage of the Pro Bowler's Tour yet (and isn't Parker Bohn grateful for that)? Hey Brian where are you? Give us a shout if you're still with us… Jimmy Mack, if Brian's abandoned you, we've got a franchise up in Seattle looking for a new head coach…

And finally it was "beat your ex co-worker" week indeed as Brian Legere grabbed the Prudential Securities reunion bragging rights with a 39 - 23 Wet Toast Offense win over Fab Sparacino and The Last Touch Don. Despondent with his latest loss, Fab got high after the game and accidentally killed his wife's poodle! Before anyone gets all mad at me for the "dead dog" comment, just watch HBO's re-run of last Sunday's Sopranos episode and get back to me, OK? After the game both teams were left with, take a guess, yes five (5) wins. "Number 5 is alive!". A free Jon Kitna throwback jersey to the first owner to correctly identify the name of the movie that quote is from and the female lead in it. No help from the audience please…

Week 12 games look like this: We've already discussed two of them. Bubba's Brew Crew (8 - 2 - 1) takes the league lead into play against Austin Powers in Golden Domer (8 - 3) and Late For Draft (0 - 11) tries to get off the elongated Schneid when they play the Wet Toast Offense (5 - 6). Down Boy! (5 - 6) tries to give the bone to Douche's Wild (5 - 5 - 1), and for some reason, I suspect Rob might actually enjoy that… The Moops (5 - 5 - 1) hope to get The Bubble righted when they meet The Rising (5 - 6) who STILL have a dead Ike Hilliard on their roster (hint hint, I hear T.J. Rubley's available!). Cut The Cord (5 - 6) plays the River Ave Rats (4 - 7), The Last Touch Don (5 - 5 - 1) takes on Kang Kong (5 - 6) and KGB III (7 - 4) meet The Moon Runners (8 - 3).

Hey it's almost 9PM and the Victoria Secret's Fashion Show is on CBS! Talk about your must see TV! Sexy models in skimpy lingerie and wearing large angel wings! Toto, I don't think we be in Kansas any more! Gotta run and make sure the satellite dish is aligned properly! 'til next week…