Hello everyone and welcome to Week 3 in the NHL. Well it's late October and we've got a holiday coming up. So in News & Notes tradition, here's our first holiday Top 10 of the season…

Top 10 Ways to Tell It's Halloween in the NHL

10. Anaheim changes it's team name from The Mighty Ducks to The Friendly Ghosts
9. It's Fright Night in Columbus as all the safety netting is removed from around the rink and everyone is given seats just above the glass line. Thirteen year-old girls get in free…
8. Freddie Krueger sits atop the league leaders in slashing penalties
7. Witches called for off-sides as flying broomsticks keep crossing the blue line ahead of the puck. Flying broomsticks? This is hockey not Quidditch!
6. Ichabod Crane and The Headless Horseman become guest referees and bring a new meaning to the term "hurry up face-off"
5. Got to like those new costumes the Washington Capitals are wearing. You know, the ones that have them disguised as a good hockey team
4. Forget about obstruction. Refs start handing out two-minute minors for "cackling in the Neutral Zone"
3. Who needs to trade for Curtis Joseph when you can have free-agent Jason Vorhees, the Friday the 13th guy, in between the pipes?
2. No that's not Stu Grimson coming out of retirement to play on the Rangers checking line, that's the real Grim Reaper! Somebody have the referee check the curve on that scythe…
… and the #1 way to tell it's Halloween in the NHL …
1. It's the Great Pumpkin, Curtis Brown!

And how about this Jason Vorhees guy? You know I really like the simple "Jacques Plante throwback" style to Jason's mask, and all the scouting reports have nothing but praise for the speed of his knife hand! I hear he's been working with those French brothers up in Quebec. You know, the two world renowned goalie coaches, the Allaire brothers, Francois and Benoit? Wasn't one of them in Friday The 13th, Part XVII, Jason Takes The Crease? Anway, I think they're trying to convince him it'd be easier to hook up with an NHL team if he changed his name to Jean-Andre Vorhees…

Well it's the 4th paragraph or so of the News & Notes column so that must mean it's time to turn on the radio for some more hit music about our favorite Inuit Eskimo hockey player, Jordin Tootoo. This week we go all Hip-Hop on the Predator, despite the fact that country music's the name of the game down in Nashville. This week's choices on the Hit Parade, include: Will Smith's "Just The Tootoo of Us" ("Just Tootoo and us, we can make it if we try… "), Rob Base's "It Takes Tootoo" ("It takes Tootoo to make the shift go right, Eskimo guy he's really out of sight… ") and MC Hammer's "Tootoo Legit 2 Quit" ("Tootoo's legit, Tootoo legit to\ quit…") Again vote for your favorite or select last week's leading vote getter, Meatloaf's "Tootoo Out of Three Ain't Bad"…

Meanwhile perusing the league standings, it appears we've got a rookie in 1st place! My, my, Johnny Wrobel how did we let this happen? Oh well, enjoy while you can. You know what they say. Icing Happens… Last week's leader, Speedo Joe and Charlie "Hobey" Baker's My Toy Pony Takes Big Sh*ts (and fill in your favorite vowel there for the asterisk) drops to 2nd followed by two big movers, Walt Cherniak's Foil Up Coach (+ 11 ½) and the He-Man Devil Haters Club (+10) of Don Cardoza in 3rd and 4th respectively. Brian Legere (rhymes with Giguere) and Cousin Brucie Lerman's Canada Dry round out the Top Five. Meanwhile down at the other end of the standings, the team owned by The Commish and Kevin Kelly sucks Zhitnik (13th place) and the only consolation for Rob Hanratty, currently mired in last place (thank you very much Mr. Heatley!), is that if you put the standings page in a Ferrari and flipped the car upside down, he'd be in first…

In other NHL news, it appears that Jaromir Jagr and his girlfriend have broken up. Anyone care to bet me even money we're gonna be reading about Anna Kournikova again real soon? And on that note, I've got to say so long for this week. Thank you, good night, drive home safely and don't forget to tip your linesmen… 'til next week…

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