Well it looks like things have finally "jumped the shark" in San Jose as the Sharks have fired coach Darryl Sutter, claiming the team lacked heart. Well heart and a couple of holdouts (Stuart, Nabokov) and a retirement (Gary Suter) I'm sure the coach had absolutely nothing to do with. So why not fire the GM? Anyway, to replace Sutter, San Jose has hired Ron Wilson. Now if you're trying to add a little "heart" to the team you don't go hiring Ron Wilson. You want a little Heart? Well how about Ann or Nancy Wilson? Hey wait I think I feel a song parody coming on! Now do I do "Barracuda", "These Dreams", "If Looks Could Kill" or "Magic Man"? Maybe next week…

Yet another coaching firing this week as the Calgary Flames have let Greg Gilbert go after a lengthy losing streak. Not much more to say about this coaching change. Mostly because I can't tie the interim coach's name, Al MacNeil, to any pop music reference. So let's just talk about they're backup goalie instead, OK? In light of recent injuries to Jamie McLennan, Calgary's called up goaltender Levente Szuper from their AHL affiliate in Saint John (that's in Nova Scotia I believe in case you're wondering, Ron can I get a confirmation on that?). Yes folks, Szuper Man is now in the NHL! On the bench he's Clark Kent, but if called into a game, he jumps into the penalty box, rips off his jersey and emerges on the ice as Szuper Man! And let's not even begin talking about a guy who's first name is Levente! Sounds like an Italian porn star doesn't it? Rob, can I get some information on this one from you? Has the Flames backup goalie done any porn lately? Or perhaps just some "straight to video then to Cinemax on Friday night" kind of stuff? Inquiring minds want to know…

Staying with the Flames for just one more sentence or two, what's up with their alternate jersey? I know we've discussed this before, it's a huge horse head with flames coming out of it's nose! Not for nothing but if your nostrils are flaring up that badly, perhaps it's time to try a little Sinutab or something? Come on Calgary promotional department! I'm talking product tie-ins here! Former High Exalted Original League Commissioner Joe Mastrangelo, this is your line of work, get these guys on the phone…

Moving along to other news, two 10 game win streaks went by the boards this week as the Canucks and the Senators both have gotten real hot as of late. The Canucks are obviously enjoying the presence of that "alternate dimensional opening" that seems to have shifted from Tampa Bay to Minnesota to Boston and now up to the Pacific Northwest thus far this season. That's fine with me just so long as they don't go back to those absolutely atrocious brown, orange and yellow sweaters they wore the last time they were this good (Quick Ranger fans, 1994 Stanley Cup flashback! Soak it in while you can…) And ten wins in a row for the Senators? Well, then obviously these senators were not Democrats…

We've had our first trade this season already! Brian Legere took a little time Between Periods to trade Jaromir "Meister" Jagr and Freddy Brathwaite to Rob Hanratty's Five Minute For F***ing (foiling? fanning? fencing? farting! No, it couldn't be farting, could it?) in exchange for Ronny Francis and Dan "Goalie From An Alernate Dimension" Cloutier. That oughta shake things up a tad! Calling Walt and Trader Neil, Brian and Rob have drawn first blood! Can you counter? Oh, one more detail about the trade. Rob has insisted that along with Jagr and Brathwaite, that Brian throw in one dirty diaper, which Rob will then give to new dad Kevin Kelly! Guess we can call that one a three way deal…

Now that the holiday season is upon us, it's time for our usual "Holiday In The NHL" Top 10, only this week, since it's Hannukah (or is that spelled Chanukah? Neil, can I get a ruling?), I'm going to cut this down to a Top 8, one for each night! OK, here goes nothing, let's see if I can pull this one off.

Top 10, no make that 8, Ways to Tell It's Hannukah (or Chanukah) in the NHL